You Can Be Happy Single
Now…I am not a ultra feminist, male bashing, super independent, career driven don’t care for penis woman by any means. I am all for women empowerment, but at the same time I do honor and respect the family union, and do want a healthy union at some point. I am just someone who believes everyone should be happy and WHATEVER happy looks like for you, you should be THAT! For me currently, that’s single. I’ve done celibacy, I’ve done marriage, I’ve done local relationships and a long distance relationship, long term relationships, and flings but I’ve realized I’ve never really done a full year to myself and I’ve never really done dating effectively. So I’ve challenged myself to do it, and in that order! Year to self, and then dating effectively. Until then, I’m single and I’m happy, sincerely. Where does the happiness come from? The happiness comes from taking accountability. Realizing I still have work to do on me emotionally, my trust issues tend to get in the way of me moving forward healthy in relationships, and acknowledging that has helped push me into other categories of healing.
Single Doesn’t Mean Lonely
What’s your zodiac sign? I’m a Gemini, and I’m the only child. So my sign is the twins and we are ruled by Mercury the ultimate communicator, Geminis love stimulation, creation, education etc. and also me being the only child I have this thing I call ‘The only child syndrome’ where I’m used to entertaining myself because I was really creative as an only child. So because of that I know how to cope with not having anyone around, also only child syndrome means sometimes I like to share and other times I can be selfish, because as an only child you tend to get your way, you have everything to yourself and you don’t have to share with anyone because it’s just you, no siblings. So having ‘the only child syndrome’ I was prepared for solidarity. I could never be bored or utter those words because I’m always having some thing to do. I love researching, learning new things, practicing what I learn, exercising, meditating, reading, writing, dancing, watching my favorite shows and movies on Netflix, talking to friends on the phone, doing activities with the kids, spending time with family, handling business, helping others build brands, creating art etc. The possibilities are endless! Boredom is never in my vocabulary, nor is loneliness. I’m also an empathic intuitive so I’m fully aware that spirits are always around us and I communicate and engage with spirit realm as well so single is never solemn. There’s always something to do!
Hey…Just Get Busy Or Not!
A few tips to living your best single life
Tip 1: Write That Sh!t out!
Missing your ex? Grieving? New opportunities? Business success? Challenges? Pissed off? Having a celebration? Write that sh!t out! Journal writing is one of my favorite past times. There is great healing in writing down your thoughts, and feelings and guided journals are great too! The prompts really help, esp if you’re someone who doesn’t really know where to start or how to start writing. If you keep your emotions bottled in you are either a ticking time bomb that may blow up on innocent bystanders or even tea kettles that will soon boil over onto others. So go ahead woo-sah! and write it down.
Tip 2: Enhance Your Environment
I have a saying: “Ambiance is EVERYTHING!” I believe your surroundings impact your mood. Burn that Sage, that Palo Santo, and incense, clear out that old stagnant energy. When my place is clean and organized, I feel like I can operate at a higher level. When my office lamp is on red and yellow it’s really vibey for me. When my room LED light is set to red or indigo blue it’s a mood, I feel very relaxed or super sultry. When I have my crystals around me, my amethyst, my selenite towers, my tigers eye, my Rose quartz eggs, and I love the yoni eggs with the drilled holes, for easy removal, but that’s a whole new conversation! You may be tempted to do some other things in that environment when you get in the mood! And I encourage that also! Embrace your Sensuality and sexuality. We speak in depth about intimacy on the Podcast. But the energy in my room and office is amazing! Also plants and flowers, succulents are amazing they don’t require much sun or water and live plants add electricity to your environment, life! were are electric, we are life.
Tip 3: Sweat That Sh!t Out!
Get moving! Have you ever heard the term ‘revenge body’ ? Well get your revenge body on! What better way to occupy your spare time than to get on that bike, take that Zumba class, Spin class, kick boxing class, yoga class and the time you would’ve spent crying you can sweat those tears out and transform them into abs and a tight a$$! I’ve been back in the gym and it really helps to boost those endorphins and self esteem. The better you feel about you, the healthier a bond you can build with others.
Tip 4: Retail Therapy
Shopping makes me happy. Period!
Clothes shopping, grocery shopping, tech shopping… Anything new that gives me instant gratification is rewarding. Winter time is coming, mama needs a new jacket, new boots, new shoes, scarves etc. New iPhone is out, a new year is on the horizon. Out with the old in with the new! A great way to take part in that is selling your old stuff to make money, what better way to get new stuff than selling things you no longer use? It’s a great way to bless others, give back and be rewarded at the same time. ‘Tis the season!
Tip 5: Skin Envy
Take excellent care of the skin you’re in with great skin care products. We’re almost in winter solstice and skin will be more susceptible to chapping and dryness. Maintaining great skin is a must! I will be doing a review on some of my favorite skin care products. I have been paying more attention to ingredients in products lately so what’s in product matters to me. Beauty regimens can be extensive and skin care products can be expensive so I also love companies that have ethically sourced products and offer payment plans for different budgets!
Tip 6: …OR NOT (the opposite of getting busy)
Relax
“Sometimes we’re so busy making a living, we barely have time to live a life”
-Empress
Do you feel guilty when you sleep in late? Catch up on your Netflix subscription that you barely get to watch? Choose to order out versus cook? Why? Sometimes we need to unplug. I unplug to sustain. Prevent yourself from burnout. We need rest, our digestion needs rest, our mind needs mental rest, it’s ok to BREATHE and just BE. We are spiritual Beings having a physical experience so we must enjoy life the way it was intended before we became workhorses. Kudos to those who are already living their dream lives. That is a authentic freedom
Tip 7: Take A Trip!
Get out of your town, get out of your city, get out of the country! It’s good for your soul to get away. It’s great for peace, it’s great for content, it’s great for adding to having a more cultured lifestyle. Below are a list of places that are offering holiday getaway deals!
Prince Edward County offer ends 5/6/22
Save on your stay and dining at Niagara Falls offer ends 12/23/21
4 night stay in Blue Mountain Chalet offer ends 3/25/22
I love to travel! Check out my blog about my visit to Mexico earlier this year. And guess what? It doesn’t hurt to take selfies in exotic places to show off how you’ve been glowing and flowing with your happy single self!
If you’re healing from a relationship and could get closure, those are the best, if you could be civilized and cordial with your ex that is a blessing, if you guys could still be friends even better! But if not, get the closure you need for yourself. You don’t need their side to get closure to be at peace. Learn from your experience and continue to live and love on yourself and you will blossom into a beautiful butterfly and attract who and what you deserve. Trust me. When things don’t work out it doesn’t mean the person isn’t a good person (although sometimes that’s exactly what it means!) But if they’re a great person and the split is amicable and you guys can be around each other and still enjoy each other’s presence (minus the benefits👀) that is a wonderful thing. Sometimes the relationship is better as friends and sometimes it’s just the timing in life, either or, taking time for yourself is a wonderful thing.
So in conclusion, being single isn’t miserable, it isn’t lonely, it doesn’t have to be and it shouldn’t have to be. If you are single it is a wonderful opportunity to partake on a journey of self discovery and every day should be an exciting adventure to unlocking new aspects of a more beautiful YOU 3.0. Here’s some eargasm to self reflect, Love on Thyself a little extra, and by the time you encounter another soul they will be just as beautiful as you have become if not more abundantly and ready to embrace the healthy new transformation you embody.
Cheers!
Issa Stush Lyfe 